Wednesday, December 31, 2008

一定做过的18件傻事!!!‏

1.用手插入米缸的米里面插来插去 (checked!)

2、地下有阶砖时,特意隔一格一格来走(不可走过界,要完全在格内)(checked!)

3、用镜面反射阳光,照来照去 (checked!)

4、铺张纸在硬币上面,然后用铅笔在上面描,描个形出来 (checked!)

5、吃完瑞士糖之后,将糖纸包回原本四四方方的形状出来 (checked!)

6、超级市场踩着购物车行走 (checked!)

7、贴张写着“我是白痴”的纸条在同学的背后 (checked!)

8、拍别人左边 站在别人右边 (checked!)

9、踩别人的影子 (checked!)

10、丢别人门口的拖鞋下楼

11、下楼梯时坐在扶手上面滑下来 (checked!)

12、在电梯上往相反方向走 (checked!)

13、用萤光笔油指甲

14、下雨打伞,总是故意地转那把伞 (checked!)

15、家里没人时,对着镜子学跳舞/演戏/唱歌 (checked!)

16、在街上见到狗就扮猫叫,见到猫就扮狗吠 (checked!)

17、下雨的时候,拿起伞故意往雨大的地方走去 听雨啪啪的声音 感觉很爽 (checked!)

18、玩家电包装里的那张有很多泡泡的塑料膜,把泡泡一个一个按破 (checked!)

其中至少你做过5项~

omg i retrieved it from a forward message and it's super super accurate okay. and i cant help laughing at own stupidity when i found that most of the things i really did it before. hahahahaha! so stupid can die! but think bout it if not of all these stupid thingy, life won't be that fun right haha. wtheck wtheck who so genius can list out these. =D

big day big day!

it's the boyfriend's birthday!
people, spam his text message inbox if you haven't!
don't have his phone number? message me @ 0163852050 and i'll tell you!
good day people! thanks!

=)

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

angel. ecstasy.

i was in paradise for two days.
and i want more and more of the happy days.
i want to have more fun and grin the whole day.
too bad no photos at all but luckily memories stay.
good times, laughter, i hope they last, i pray.

=)

Monday, December 29, 2008

a short one ;)

CHU MEI FONG THE PIG, ALL THE BEST IN U.S.! LEARN SOME KICK-ASS STREET DANCE BEFORE YOU COME BACK! =)


you see now the s4's geminian are leaving one by one. 1st is Victor currently in Russia studying doctor. and now Mei is leaving for US. in less that 2 months time, Eva will be leaving for Aussie. but promise, we will come back as in a better man. kudos geminians! i'm proud of you guys! =)

Saturday, December 27, 2008

I got it from my mamak, i got it from my mamak.... XD

man, i miss the Hitz fm morning crew JJ & Rudy. super match but now they're gone wtheck. guess what their version of 'i got it from my mamak' is turning in my head so badly. i miss them. =( now Gotcha is no more interesting, morning is not anticipating. I MISS YOU JJ & RUDY! =( and i downloaded the very funny 'i got it from my mamak' hahahahahah can laugh non stop and the lyric keep turning turning non stop.

i got it from my mamak, i got it from my mamak, i got it from my mamak, i got it got it got it....

okay la i share it here la =p JJ & RUDY ROCKS! =)



Hey JJ...
Laparla...
Yeala, where you wanna go ah?
Dunno, you got kereta?
No ah... jalan lah
HERE WE GO!

JJ, where'd you get your canai from?
Rudy, where'd you get your maggi from?
JJ, where'd you get your tosai from?
Rudy, where'd you get your curry from?

I got it from my mamak! I got it from my mamak! I got it from my mamak! I got it got it got it...

JJ, where'd you get your kopi from?
Rudy, where'd you get your nasi from?
JJ, where'd you get your sambal from?
Eh, Rudy, where'd you get your tapau from?

I got it from my mamak! I got it from my mamak! I got it from my mamak! I got it got it got it...

Mamak, looking good from his head to his toe,
Curry overload, body out of control,
Open 24, you can always go,
So happening, also got cendol,

Roti smelling good, they don't use ghee,
It's almost four, it's the place to eat, (apa khabar?)
You can tell curry's been there for a week, (wah sedap!)
Mamak made it hot, I can feel the heat!

So be jolly good and thank your mamak,
He makes food just like a sauna,
Panas, panas, here it comes now, panas, panas, here it comes now,
Oooo

I got it from my mamak! I got it from my mamak! I got it from my mamak! I got it got it got it...

Aney, Aney, Tolong kira please boss!
(Some tamil convo here lolz)

- What?
- Ten ringgit forty cent, buuuttt for you guys - Ten ringgit.
- THANK YOU MACHA!

Eh Rudy..
Ah..
Mmm, tak rasa la. Not enough spice la...
Don't worry, I know what to do man.
Really?

(Telephone dialling)
HEY JIN!
Ow Sh*t, it's the morning crew!
HAhahahahahaha

Ho, you ain't hungry?
Well - I - am,
Take you to a place where they don't eat ham,
Speak malay or speak chinese,
A little bit of rice and some black eyed peas,
Where else can you go and eat real late?
Straight from the club and it's food on your plate,
Love Mackie Diz, but not today,
Think I'm in the mood for some cool teh,
Tell JJ, I think I found a winner,
Me and Rudy, we both missed dinner,
So you know that we're ready to eat,
No durians, now please have a seat!

Come on...
I got it from my mamak! I got it from my mamak! I got it from my mamak! I got it got it got it...

All these food right here, I got all these from my MAMAK.
All these food right here, I got all these from my MAMAK.

Ifa roti real fine, 9 times outta 10, its coming from my mamak,
If the kopi real sweet, 9 times outta 10, its sweeter at my mamak,
If the cat's really ugly, I bet you, it is not at my mamak,
If the girl's real fine, 9 times outta 10, she's hanging at my mamak,
If you're chilling in subang, 9 times outta 10, you're chilling at my mamak,
If you're hanging in ampang, 9 times outta 10, you're hanging at my mamak,
At my mamak!

JJ, where'd you get your canai from?
Rudy, where'd you get your maggi from?
JJ, where'd you get your tosai from?
Rudy, where'd you get your curry from?

I got it from my mamak! I got it from my mamak! I got it from my mamak! I got it got it got it...
Roti make some noise!
If you like kopi, make some noise!
If you like mamak, make some noise!
Make some noise, Make some noise, noise, noise...
(noi, noi, noi, noi, noi...)

Ok, ok enough of the noise, eh - macha, macha, Rudy - Stop with the tin cans la!
Are you serious?
Yeala please
Alrite
Eh, but how's your roti ah?
Ooo, dahsyat man
Eh, eh whatchu got eh watchu wat's that?
Eheh, chicken, lamb, everything inside!
Got telur?
GOOOOOTTTT

(credit to Shaun) =)

enjoy! =)
hohoho i succeeded thanks for those who prayed for me! =D

Friday, December 26, 2008

wishlist

wahai kawan-kawan,
sila pray untuk saya. saya nak sesuatu sangat sangat desperate. tolong pray untuk kebaikan saya. saya akan bersyukur banyak banyak jika betul betul berjaya. please please please. more people pray more efficient one.. ini peluangku yang terakhir sebelum kutinggal. pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeee people



thankyouverymuch. (if i really succeed)

yang ikhlas,
Va.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

what an xmas.

things never goes on the right lane. and when i'm in deep shit. shits pour more on me. and i'm totally smelly now. wtheck!

tag by Tzen Reeves. =)

Just type whatever you thought of based on those word/questions/etc

BMW or Mercedes?
BMW cause i like. =p

Chocolate.
tell me who doesn't like chocolate???????? oh milk chocolate's my preference. *hint wtheck*

Angelina Jolie or Jennifer Aniston?
er... i dont know eh.. i want to be neutral can?

Lemon.
perfect match with HONEY!!

Hollywood or New York?
Paris cannot? sigh. New York i think. but i got so many good friends from Hollywood eg Tzen and Momoko. how ah so hard to choose. =p

Girls are all money faced.
wtheck is this statement. should say everyone is money face lor.. don't tell me when you see a 100bucks note on the floor you wont keep staring at it lor.. and if got people give you money, you will die die want to reject meh?

Obama?
wtheck does this statement wants? lol. opinion about Obama or what? =___________=
nevermind. Obama relates with USA. wtheck that's all i know.

McDonald.
hohoho one of my favourite. current favorite is PROSPERITY BURGER! like every year keep waiting for this moment. wtheck.

Favorites?
=____________= what kinda question again. my favourite is my boyfriend. accepted? wtheck.

Face.
if it's bout my face, i have to say that i'm 99.99% confirm Spongebob is my long lost brother wtheck. we share the same square face. we share the dot dot dot pimples wtheck and we almost share the same color tone wtheck. we have big eyes too lol.

A Word.
word. =________=

Tag 3 person.
dont feel like tagging now cause those people i tag mostly didnt do one. =(

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

oh-so-random-can-die

i was grumbling to the boyfriend that people don't really update their blogs now and he said i'm the only one who is so free to write post. =__________= seriously i wanted to update more bout my previous weeks but sangat malas nak upload photo. wtheck. go either my facebook or friendster to view those photos la if you really interested (later only me myself is interested wtheck) and i shall keep thinking if update them here. =_____=

christmas eve today. celebrate anyone? wtheck i damn lonely now waiting for reply sambil writing post. my every xmas eves since last 3 years were always lonely. kena curse i think lol. mom won't allow me to go out tonight so yea anyone want to visit me? http://matcuoi.com anyhoo, MERRY XMAS PEOPLE! i shall be waiting for Santa tonight if i never doze off suddenly la lol.

and bout my new house thingy. wtheck i can't manage to move in before CNY already cause the renovation thingy is dragging too much. and no money. very very poor. http://matcuoi.com(i think i shall start the donation thingy in my blog so that people can donate to me wtheck.)

i'm so lifeless these days. and i am aiming for something. so my life is all about that thing now. at least i got an aim wtheck. hope my effort get paid off as soon as possible although i dont really see that day coming wtheck. but i stubborn i still want to try.

i cannot tahan pimples already. http://matcuoi.comthese days evading my face kao kao. and like so obvious suddenly pop out one here one there. at my chin right below my lip, above my lip, forehead, near my eyes wtheck all those stupid places. concealer also no use i want to die.

i miss the boyfriend. rejected a date yesterday thanks to my very very dearest mom. http://matcuoi.comi miss my boyfriend like the Milk Bottle sayang his bottle wtheck. lurve sick. =(

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

好想哭。=(

Monday, December 22, 2008

shut up please!

i need consideration from people. like so desperate.
i need cooperation from others. like so desperate.
i need approvals of my parents. like so damn desperate.
i need attention from everyone. like so bloody desperate.
i need no arguments, sound pollutions, forces, yelling, door slamming, and black smelly faces. like so damn freaking desperate.

shut up shut up! wtheck i hope i'm deaf.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

idontwanttoleave.

caution: super long rant. =(

在friendster看到学妹的很多自拍照,才发现以前的我也曾经花了不少时间自拍。 =________________= 最近发现太多的‘以前’了。我真的在长大了。

长大好不好?太抽象了吧。

其实大家都把我看得太好了。常听到朋友说我家境怎样好啦、成绩怎样好啦、上镜啦、这个那个啦。但其实我真的什么都不太像是。别人总是看到好的而已。一个好需要很多很多的不好兑换,不好通常都不光荣所以不必宣传,正确来说应该是我把自己包装得很好吧。哈!

双子座是善变的。我是典型双子座。我变,因为周遭环境要我变。我变,因为我希望有更多的人能接纳我。我变,因为我要成为所有人眼中最好的我。我变,因为容易相信,相信别人给的意见会使自己变得更好。因为习惯这样,我已经不感觉变的累了。

我是变了。但我还是正常人一个。还是会吃喝拉屎,还是会发脾气,还是会有时睡觉流口水,还是会有最糟最丑的一面,即使再好这些很糟糕的一面还是会存在。没有认识完美的。应该说因为不完美而有价值吧。哈哈!(有时还蛮喜欢自己的不完美 =__________=)

除了打部落我真的不知道能怎样打发时间了。

其实我的人生还蛮没目标的。大家都错了。出国留学又怎样?我别无选择。这不是我的意愿。但在这种情况下,出国留学是最好的决定。说实在的,我并没有心理准备。科系也不是自己要读的,去的地方也不是想去的,读的大学也不是心目中理想的学校。go abroad for the sake of going wtheck. 因为不喜欢现在的处境,希望时间能快点过。早点出国代表早一点回国,早一点回国代表可以早一点有自己的自由,可以早一点主宰自己的生活。好希望一眨眼3年就会过。

明年在国外应该会花很多时间再哭吧。哈哈!我不喜欢重新适应环境。真得很累。wtheck typing chinese also damn tiring wtheck. still need to translate from english damn tedious but is good for killing time wtheck. okay back to topic, i really need to bring lotsa tissue paper to aussie cause heard that aussie's grocery, convenient goods this and that everything is so spensive so yea people recommend me the cheapest brand of tissue in malaysia wtheck. ohmygod i really dont want to leave my comfort zone la. sien i dont want to go abroad why stupid monash have so limited course in malaysia and none of them satisfied my dad. =( stupid queensland stupid queensland i dont want to go. =( and today only i know that i haven't buy the flight ticket back to malaysia on coming april. sob i dont want to stay in aussie doing nothing and cry for the whole week during the stupid academic break.

OH AND EVERYONE OUT THAT WHICH HAVEN'T UPDATE BOUT ME FOR SOME TIME, YOURS TRULY IS NOT GONNA TAKE ANY COMMUNICATION COURSES, NOT BROADCAST NOR PUBLIC RELATION FORGET BOUT EVENT MANAGEMENT. wtheck. my dad convinced me to apply for business management last few months when i was applying for universities and now so damn good other than Monash non of them offer me communication courses (which monash's communication is not that good) instead offering me bloody commerce/business management/business yada yada yada. and my dad is so damn happy cause i can get into queensland's business faculty and now he wants me to study E-Business wtheck. he wants me to trust him and said i will be so successful when i finish this course cause every field needs internet in the future and e-business will be so popular. the prob is i don't like e-business. i don't like facing the computer instead of real man, REAL PEOPLE OKAY???? i want to talk with real people can? wtheck.

and another freaking thing is NUMBERS!!! like now i really can die with numbers already. stupid accounting i have to retake and business is about numbers okay. is like i once thought after leaving ADP i won't have to deal with super numbers like in those accounting and calculus and i'm so wrong now. wtheck. now you see Eva you see numbers. freaking numbers from 1 to 10000000000000000000000000000000000000 okay. bloody calculator i hate calculators cause other people can hit the right numbers and i use calculator also can hit wrong numbers and get wrong answers.

wait too far, back to topic. i dont want to go aussie next year. die die dont want laaaa.. i dont want to do house chores. i want to meet my boyfriend very frequently. i want to speak chinese with people. i dont like angmoh. i want bak kut teh. i want KTM i want freaking 126 port klang bus i want AC's best chicken teriyaki don i want bakery's best bread i want fohfoh's chrysanthemum can drink... i just dont want to go aussie ='(

i really scare next feb i really will runaway from departing. i scare i will cry and refuse to go into the flight.will everything be alright? will everything pass in a wink? will i come back in one piece? will everyone forget me? will i lost the things i precious the most?

i dont want to leave. http://matcuoi.com

*ignore me i'm not in the mood.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

home is not that sweet home after all.

and for those concerning ones,
i'm still in Klang wtheck. the boyfriend and friends went to Langkawi yesterday night and i wasn't allow to go so yea i wasn't grinning bout that few days ago. thanks for those who wish me to have fun in Langkawi. i think your wish is essential in my dream =___________= omg since when i become so lame wtheck.

okay imma gonna bake cookies with another pig who likes to kick my butt and say my bad words in front of dad and mom and laugh like a devil after that wtheck.

anyone want to visit me at my house? saya sangat the boring most of the time. and my mom cannot tahan see me sleeping so i can't sleep. my dad cannot tahan see me keep sitting in front of the computer so i cannot keep online. and i cant download msn messenger for gawd knows what reason so i cant chat with people online. bout the new house thingy i can't do anything now cause my dad has 2 meetings today and my appointment with him is only after evening wtheck so i'm stucked now. i don't watch teevee so i didn't watch any. i edi clean my room for 2nd time in a week so my room doesn't need cleaning anymore right now. i play the piano but too long didn'tt play edi i play until very teruk so i dont want to play anymore. i am enough of hanging around. i am waiting for the boyfriend's text reply. i am enough of eating like 24-7 other than sleeping everyone keep sharing food with me. tell me what can i do more. sien.

okay la bye bye i really want to bake cookies already. wtheck.

A to Z taggie

tagged by Nicholas Ng. thanks for giving me something to update. =.= i sangat the lazy to update already wtheck. when i'm busy with college, i have no time to update. when i'm free from school now, i very lazy to update. wtheck this is call human nature. =p



A. Attached or Single?
Should be attached wtheck.



B. Best Friend?
Khai Wee sweetie. =) (the left one. the right one is tortoise Shien)

the one i called during late nights and cried to, the one i have gallons of gossips to tell with, the one i wanted to share all the good and bad with other than the boyfriend, the one i can trust and tell everything to, the one who knows me and always give advices and will tell me i'm wrong sincerely, the one who won't betray me won't hurt me. she's the one among those i precious the most and she's the one can't afford to lose. =)

imissher.


C. Cake or pie?
both. =)
i always have sudden crave for cakes. =D
and i like starbuck's shepherd pie.



D. Day of choice?
no specific preference eh... any day which i can date is a nice day. =)


E. Essential item?
mobile phone, laptop, money laaa...


F. Favorite colour?
black and white. if they are counted as colors wtheck.


G. Gummy bears or worms?
worms can eat eh? i don't like both. but at least gummy bears are least gross. ewwww....


H. Hometown?
Sasaran. somewhere near Kuala Selangor.


I. Favorite indulgence?
boyfriend? =.=
my bed i think.
starbucks lol.
indulge in money can? hahaha... (wtheck since when i become so moneyminded.)


J. January or July?
hmm... for next year i like both. cause i'm in Malaysia both the months. =) but i still will prefer July more cause after January i will be departing damn scare can and the whole July i will be in Malaysia wooohoooo! *grin grin grin* =D


K. Kids?
gaaaaah the annoyed one. i can play with them for a short while only. if not the mothers will sue me for abusing their kids wtheck.


L. Life isn't complete without?
lurve. (omg seriously i damn lovey dovey eh..)
money. $.$
people! i can die to live alone hor...


M. Marriage date?
wtheck this is like a date at least in the future 10 years. how i wish i could predict time lol.


N. Number of brothers and sisters?
3 annoyed pigs. oh and i'm a princess wtheck.


O. Oranges or apples?
i don't eat oranges. but i drink orange juice. =p


P. Phobias?
anchovies. anything fishy will make me puke. like most of the pulau ketam wtheck.
bad hair day.
alone in stage.
i lost my phone.
eating alone in crowded place (like AC wtheck)


Q. Quotes?
船到桥头自然直 (wtheck i mengamal this principle for so many years already and most time it works =___________________=)
don't cry because it's over, smile because it happens.
smile all the while, you won't know who will fall in lurve with your smile =)



R. Reasons to smile?
We don't need reason to smile wei!
okay la sometimes i need.
i smile to avoid crying. like seriously this is to hide my sadness. kinchin knows. haha.
i smile to survive. cause i learnt that people don't like unhappy people. people cannot accept unhappy people. and i can't live without people. wtheck.
other than that, i smile because i want to! =)


T. Tag 5 people
Tzen
Momoko
Weeliang
Jason
Kinchin


U. Unknown fact about me?
omg i can't think of any now. will edit this part when i thought of one. =p

V. Vegetable?
forced to eat by the boyfriend. =______________= i like broccoli and tomato the best. =)

W. Worst habits?
Stubborn.
Self-centred.
Sleep like pig.
Not concentrate enough to listen to others.
Easily addicted.
No financial planning. (like i have 50 bucks in hand i will use em up not even a penny left wtheck)
stingy
selfish
a lot more eh ask me personally la now i can't think of so much

X. X-ray or Ultrasound?
har? got difference one? @.@

Y. Your favorite type of food?
i like Japanese rice
i like BK Mushroom Swiss
i like McDonald's
i like New Zealand natural
i like Secret Recipe's Macoroni Cheese
i like Banana Split
i like mashed potatoes
i like Rocky
i like................................... wtheck you name it i might like it lol.

Z. Zodiac
the best among the best - Gemini! =D

Thursday, December 18, 2008

i just want to grin now. =)

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

the despo.

i have so many overdue post to blog, so many photos to post. from the adp johor gang, to the commencement, from the volunteering job to the Awana holiday. oh and bout my freaking 3rd sem transcript. but saya sangat the nervous now. (i cant think of any other more suitable expression cause aku sangat sangat nervous) nervous cause i so wanted to go vacation with the boyfriend and friends this coming friday at Langkawi but i got rejected by my parents already and now i wanted to try one more time when they are back home later. ah so nervous i scare i kena reject again. =( seriously i have been such a good girl these days. my last outing with my friends or boyfriend was during commencement that day. is like few weeks back lor... i didn't even ask permission for outing, and helped my dad as much as possible in Genting. and i didn't even use money these days (other than phone reload) and i got rejected dismissively wtheck. I WANT TO GO LANGKAWI!!!! =( i don't know how to ask my parents already. plus me and mom just got some argument yesterday. and she keep saying i have no contribution to the family wtheck. how to persuade her la? sigh.

anyone want to help to set up my new house? i'm doing this with my sis now. planning, painting, designing, everything. we are short of time now cause we tend to move in before chinese new year and renovation havent start at all yet. and we have budget constraint now so everything have to be as diy as possible. and these will be the benefit you get: 1st, you can get a whole new experience of setting up house. 2nd, you can pass your time with meaningful work. 3rd, you can gain some laughter cause me and my sis can make all kind of stupid funny jokes. 4th, give a helping hand when some one in need will be so meaningful. is like lessening your karma wtheck. =______= tell me k? thanks.

oh and imma get my hands on these stuffs. =D

finally a 36-keypads touch screen phone. hohoho.. my uncle and aunt are using it and they strongly recommend it to me. my uncle always know what phone i want and suit me the best. and the price is freaking reasonable. =)

sony erricson P1i ;)

and this super mini laptop which i can bring it anywhere i want. imma going to aussie next year with sis. so we tend to buy a smaller laptop which is less heavy since we have one normal size one already.

white acer aspire one ;D

dad says within this week the laptop will be reaching. and i'm waiting for dad to be free so me and jie can buy our brand new phone. =)

now just left a permission to go langkawi, and i will be the happiest person on earth. =)

Monday, December 15, 2008

runaway.

i'm at Awana Genting now. so happy they provide computer with internet connection at the lobby. but i have to stand to use the bloody computer. =_________= it's okay.

my decision to come here is................... to stay away from my mom's very-annoying nag. like non-stop scolding nagging scolding nagging. ah at least i get some peace here. i cannot bear the noisiness these days. i will be so mang chang. wtheck.

i dont know why but i found a sentence i used few days ago is super true. everyone thought i am nice. i am this i am that all those praises. i am happy to hear that but unfortunately i'm not like that. i wrapped up myself with a very nice wrapper so that everyone can accept me. i am being nice to survive. who will want to expose the ugliest side of them? same here la. so shut up when you don't really know me but acted like you know me a lot. stop judging me, especially by my photos. i will shoot you.

Momoko, Tzen, Xin (from long to short k? =_____________=) when are we going to collect our transcript? makan lunch together k? =)

Sunday, December 14, 2008

please. i pray for the good one. please.

Saturday, December 13, 2008

return. changed. lost.

i'm back from Genting. will be going there tomorrow again. Genting is soooooooo boring. wtheck.

and Terengganu is flooding now. so the trip next monday was cancelled. and now they changed it from Awana Kijang to Awana Genting. hohoho tell me what can i do during the two days in that freaking valley. Genting is so boring sigh. so i'm thinking if i'm going or not. but the new friends wanted me and sis to go so that we can have more fun. sis wants me to go so that i can spend my nights with more people and not playing loner game. i'm still thinking.

i'm thinking. should i let go le? maybe i'm a burden already. it's so hard and i can't help keep giving myself chance. i regretted on my stupidity a week ago. and the regret will be forever. i cannot turn back time. i hope my last chance will be the right decision. and i will cherished every moment of that. it's time to learn to be responsible of my own words i guess. i truly admire the bestie's toughness and the optimism he has. hey dude, kudos! glad that you learnt, and i shall start to learn now. smile1.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

oh and i have seriously cracked lips. and i'm coughing like shyt now.










i seriously hope i wont see blood from my nose tomorrow morning. night.

Monday, December 8, 2008

tak da mood nak blog. so many things happened. i dont know which to blog first.

currently sick. with the companion of red-tide. very very suffering. my 1st day in genting, having migraine which ruined the entire evening. after that straight away caught a cold. sneeze, running nose, sneeze, running nose like marathon non-stop. and i broke my own record sneezing one-shot for 14 times. clap for me no? the worse time will be every morning with bleeding nose. i seriously want to know what is my health problem now.

too busy to blog. purposely made myself as busy as possible to minimize the thought for something else.

friday morning, was my last paper in ADP. afternoon i have my one and only commencement, which now i'm officially not a student of Taylor anymore =( after commencement, straight away rushed to genting for volunteery job, which end up i slept in the admin office's sofa the entire evening lol. saturday and sunday were dedicated to volunteery job. i was assigned to the merchandise group, which my job is to take care of the selling booth the whole day, promoting the event, selling the merchandises, and smile as wide as possible 24-7. i have to stand most of the time, approaching every passer-by, and repeating the same bloody thing until sometimes i just stucked in the middle of the sentence, and the fella will look at me in confusion. wtheck. is not easy to smile and thank when you got rejected dismissively, and have to try as hard as possible to remain okay when you actually have to suck your nose every few seconds and used up gazillion packets of tissues, and not to rub the nose too hard so to not ended up like ruddolf.

sadly, i missed the semester end celebration in Redbox with the ADPians, i missed the reunion lunch with the primary school gang, i missed the high school gathering with my beloved classmates. scarcity i should say. but i have to learn to sacrifice.

due to my very situation now, i might not blog as frequently. am going back to genting this wednesday, and be there until sunday. monday i will be going to Terengganu with whole bunch of volunteers i met these days, and spend 3 days experiencing monsoon lol wtheck. after each and every events, i have to settle to start the new house setting up. so yea bear with me for new post. =)

i'm hoping for something. till then.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

所以说,爱情是陷阱,有进无出的..
你只会越陷越深...
当有一天你离开时,你已经受伤了.....
已经不完整了...
所以呢, 只要不分手就没事了.....
-yuanshun

surprisingly 我和他的想法有点一样,只可惜这种想法是错误的。可能分手会比较痛吧所以宁可越陷越深。这不笨也不傻,只是想找最不伤害的方法而已。变质了的东西再也不会像原始那样纯净美好了。抓得回的美好也再并不单纯了。时间,考验。分手时还是会受伤。


p/s: seriously i forgot what 'surprisingly' is in mandarin. @.@
p/p/s: i'm not talking bout my relationship. i'm fine with the boyfriend. =)
爱的感觉,总是在一开始觉得很甜蜜, 总觉得多一个人陪、多一个人帮你分担, 你终於不再孤单了,至少有一个人想著你、恋著你, 不论做什么事情, 只要能一起,就是好的, 但是慢慢的,随著彼此的认识愈深, 你开始发现了对方的缺点, 於是问题一个接著一个发生, 你开始烦、累,甚至想要逃避, 有人说爱情就像在捡石头, 总想捡到一个适合自己的, 但是你又如何知道什么时候能够捡到呢?

她适合你,那你又适合她吗? 其实,爱情就像磨石子一样, 或许刚捡到的时候,你不是那么的满意, 但是记住人是有弹性的, 很多事情是可以改变的, 只要你有心、有勇气, 与其到处去捡未知的石头, 还不如好好的将自己已经拥有的石头磨亮磨,你开始磨了吗? 很多人以为是因为感情淡了, 所以人才会变得懒惰。 错! 其实是人先被惰性征服, 所以感情才会变淡的。

在某个聚餐的场合, 有人提议多吃点虾子对身体好, 这时候有个中年男人忽然说「十年前,当我老婆还是我的女朋友的时候,她说要吃十只虾,我就剥二十只给她! 现在,如果她要我帮她剥虾壳,开玩笑!我连帮她脱衣服都没兴趣了,还剥虾壳咧!

听到了吗?明白了吗? 难怪越来越多人只想要谈一辈子的恋爱,却迟迟不肯走入婚姻。 因为,婚姻容易让人变得懒惰。 如果每个人都 懒得讲话、 懒得倾听、 懒得制造惊喜、 懒得温柔体贴, 那么夫妻或是情人之间, 又怎么会不渐行渐远渐无声呢? 所以请记住: 有活力的爱情, 是需要适度殷勤灌溉的, 谈恋爱,更是不可以偷懒的喔!

如果你也正在为爱迷惘,或许下面这段话可以给你一些启示: 爱一个人,要了解,也要开解; 要道歉,也要道谢; 要认错,也要改错; 要体贴,也要体谅; 是接受,而不是忍受; 是宽容,而不是纵容; 是支持,而不是支配; 是慰问,而不是质问; 是倾诉,而不是控诉; 是难忘,而不是遗忘; 是彼此交流,而不是凡事交代; 是为对方默默祈求, 而不是向对方诸多要求; 可以浪漫,但不要浪费; 可以随时牵手,但不要随便分手。

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

exam is hectic. 2 down, 3 to go. shoulder shoulder, i need a shoulder. keep on feeling cranky but nobody to tell about. wtheck.

Monday, December 1, 2008

i'm going to cram crazily later. now only i feel the tense of finals, thinking back how hardworking are those brilliant students who didn't burn last minute oil. ah me such a failure.

after dinner at Aeon, i was so obedient studying Microeconomics at Macdonald's while mom and sis went shopping. this time i improved. i studied for 14 pages before my phone rings. after that ended up shopping with sis. @.@ shopping with sis is such fun cause usually i don't need to pay! hohoho even i have credit card, dad more sayang her so she can swipe more without being scold. mom bought me a purse (like finally @.@) and a silver tote. seriously, shopping can release moodiness lol.

ah my telos for this week is study study and study. i just want to pass every subjects so that i won't have to retake in Aussie, especially Accounting, bloody hard i don't want suffer myself next year. Sunda i want to pass Stats and Calculus. so desperate want to pass you don't fail me please. KC i'm sorry i keep skipping your class i know i'm wrong already don't fail me pleasseeeeeee. Miss Lim, aizs i dont want to please you. but i still want a pass. =(

ranting session:
i can't talk well. especially during masa genting. i don't know why but everytime i want to make things right, sure all go wrong one. sometimes the meaning comes out different also, damn sucker la. wtheck i really want to peace but i keep talking wrongly. even God also dont want to help me this time. still give me so many problems. =(

sorry cannot change anything. it's so irresponsible and i try not to use it already. it's like someone create this word to minimize the guilty of doing wrong thing. most people know the wrong thing they did, and apologized, but never try to make things right. apologize is not everything. and it's nothing when the wrong thing is repeating again and again.

i'm learning from mistakes. i am.

Sunday, November 30, 2008

快乐男人



想不到作者竟然是男生!他的部落格超有意思的,很认同他的想发。小民加油!
点击测试一下吧!

思考型(好學不倦,機智過人)


您具有退縮、聰明、專注、安靜、客觀的傾向。您不愛表露情感,內向而自給自足,以疏遠冷漠而非害怕來展現自我。您精通心智的分析,常說自己是「染上資訊毒癮的人」。您喜歡事實和系統,將聰明才智投注於這個世界上只有少數人才明白的神袐事物上。

優點:您的生活形態只求最低限度,只要一點點就過得去,簡化了物質的需求。

缺點:您以局外人的身分體驗日常生活,和自己以及外在事件皆保持距離,因此無法輕易感受即時的感覺和想法。、

愛情:親密關係成功與否,在於伴侶對您需要私隱的諒解及尊重。允許您擁有個人空間的人,才會得到您的歡心,任何侵犯或被要求的經驗都只會令您退縮。
您不輕易流露感情,只是把關係放在心靈的某個間隔裏。「當我們開車外出時,她在車上睡覺或看書,並不把注意力放在我身上,不過她還是在我身邊。」

安定方 - 挑戰型:在安定的狀態下您會變得願意承擔,既明確又平易近人。

壓力方位 - 活躍型:當面對感情的壓力或情緒對抗時,您會變得享樂主義。您會搜尋所有可能的逃脫策略,不願對任何事情做出承諾,而且顯得慌慌張張。

建意:
接納身體的感受和情緒的出現。
准許自己奢侈享樂。
避免原地踏步,嘗試採取行動

最渴望:全知,洞悉一切
最恐懼:對身邊事物感到無知,束手無策
最難達到的美德:忘我 (Detachment)
最難克服的執念:吝嗇 (Stinginess)


测验结果最偏差的一次。不认同,但可能我真的是这样吧。
心情糟透了!想哭,想骂,想喊,想倾诉,想睡了就别起来了。
唉,又要逃避现实了。
me gonna die.










me wanna die.
me dying.

Friday, November 28, 2008

of spending and wasting time

WARNING: overloaded of the chubby big face with serious black-eye-circle and frizzy hair. BEWARE!

today was cranky again. after last day in ADP, i didn't celebrate with the new gang in Sunway Pyramid. instead, bringing microeconomics bloody heavy textbook and headed to Noodle Station usual spot, try to study as much as possible while hoping my phone will ring.

i drink and ate and drink and ate and finally open up the book, read for freaking 9 pages, and suddenly saw the camera in my bag. wtheck i should have kept the camera deeper in the bag.

what do you relate with camera???

CAMWHORE!!!! and yea today is a camwhore day! =D

p/s: i haven't camwhore in the past few months and i once thought i've quitted this time-wasting hobby, and today i prove myself wrong =____________=

i love the semi-pro canon G7 although it's quite heavy if used to camwhore, it makes my hand so sour!
ah my hair is always so messy...... =((
....and someone please teach me how to photoshop my dark-eye-circle away!
and i got so bored posing the same thing again and again......
so i try to play with the timer.....
and acted tired. =________=

after that i found out the macro function and try a few attempts. eventually i have talent in it. hahahahaha... Shien, see i think my macro photo look nicer than yours even though i don't have any technique. =p

and this camera case is the one i like the most! =)

i spent the rest of my time camwhoring and totally ignored the fact that i'm going to have final exam next week. har har.

on the way back from subang, can't help not camwhoring already. too long didn't camwhore already ma...
again and again...still not enough...this is the last shot already....really i swear it will be the last shot..okay la end la end la... =p

time flies during camwhore...
....and my microeconomic textbook is still bookmarking on the 9th page.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

countdown to the farewell

82 days before i leave Malaysia for Queensland.

so many things to do, so little time. i really hope time freezes. i can feel the pressure of leaving the familiar place already. 82 days is not many i don't know what is my feeling now. like wanted to hold back something, but i can't even touch anything. i really want to appreciate everything, as if i'm not coming back again. i want to bring all the memories i have to the whole new place. i want to miss everything here when i'm there. i know there's no turning point, and i can't run away from the plane next february, which is in one of my plan if i can't take it during the farewell. i keep telling myself, everything will be alright. but the more i self-console, the more i get the tension. tension of leaving my comfort zone, tension of leaving the boyfriend, tension of not receiving good night wishes every night, tension of not having enough bear bear to protect me during the nights, tension of have to do all the chores cook the meals and wake up in time. WHY I HAVE TO LEAVE? =(

scare. tension. need a shoulder.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

imma not gonna live in the past.

i finally made up my mind not to post the few blogposts i've written in last two weeks. things have past, and i don't think i should live in the past. as long as things are not repeating, i can forgive and forget. (even though i know when it happens again i still will try to act don't know) there's nothing i can do if you don't want to tell the truth that i already know which i wanted to hear it from you. nevermind, you have your own choice. seriously i knew more than you think i should know. i have to act like i don't know anything so that i can hold back something. the relationship, the environment, the memories, other people, everything. ah but reality still harsh i shall say, so screw it. wtheck but i'm glad i knew those things, but not trusting them, at least i still reserve a chance for the truth to be told. i've less than 100 days to be spent in malaysia, and i don't think it's worth to live with the trauma you gave. at least i know the world is not kind all the time, at least now i know how to protect myself, even from the close one. thanks for giving me such a big lesson. i take it.
"爱情强求不来 勉强不来
细心 可以让爱情长久
贴心 可以让爱情甜蜜
惟有发自内心的诚意
才是打动对方的利器"
- 18禁不禁

我到底缺乏细心还是贴心啊?像我酱粗枝大叶的女生,应该两样都没有吧?但至少我有进步吧,而且很发自内心的改变。

我的蜕变,你看到了吗?...

lame yet meaningful treat of the day

trigarohnas@hotmail.com says:
next time ppl ask u what the hell hor
and the ppl damn piss u off right

evatee@hotmail.com says:
then?

trigarohnas@hotmail.com says:
u just tell them, hell is where the bad ppl will go
like YOU
haha

evatee@hotmail.com says:
haha
haahahha
hahahahahhahahahahaaaaa
imma post this up

xx

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

taggie

Tag 6 people to do this quiz and those who are tagged cannot refuse.These people must state who they were tagged by and cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by. Continue this game by sending it to other people.

I was tagged by Ming Chang aka the Cockcroach of 6M'2002

I tag Tzen, Momoko, KinChin, Jason, Edan, Sarah (lol the ADPians)


1st : What's your name?
Eva

2nd : How old are you?
legal 18 =)

3rd : What are three electronics you can't live without?
mobile, laptop, mobile. =p

4th : Are you amazing?
abuthen. lalala~

5th : What is the brand of the phone you are using?
Dopod. only canggih people use this phone. ask Momoko! haha. still got the fading effect damn canggih!

6th : What colour is your phone?
Black.

7th : Have you slept in school before?
it's a must in order to graduate =)

8th : How long are you online in one day?
more than one second. lalala~

9th : How would you describe yourself?
optimist who procrastinate. love to sleep but hardly sleep and when really sleep i sleep like pig. metabolism rate super high. dark not tanned. and basically a long-lost sister of spongebob squarepant (sob i have the same square face as him. how sad =C)

10th : What's your favourite topic to talk about?
gemini can talk everything. =)

11th : Which teacher do you like?
Sunda wtheck. i like him until i hope he can have a good rest at home and no need to be so samfu to come to teach everyday. hahahaha. see i treat like him and treat him so darn good.

12th : Who do you think is the most handsome in your class?
eh i got so many classes la. serious lor ADP don't really have leng chai. but leng lui whole bunch la. ask me who is the most ugliest in my class i can tell la lol. human nature ma.. not leng chai how to bluff?

13th : Who are you currently aiming on?
i'm aiming for........... Mr pass in next week's final. @.@

14th : Do you know a lot of your sibling's secrets?
i know leen's secret. no. leen knows more of my secret. =p
omg i don't really know Eda's secret. i'm not a concerning sis.
Ena's secret i know some also! like those bear bear's affairs. haha.

15th : How do you rate your sibling?
9.5/10
0.5 cause where got perfect one?

16th : Is your sibling gorgeous?
darn gorgeous!

17th : Do you judge people?
yes. people judge me what. judge back them la!

18th : Do you run?
i love chasing the wind. =)

19th : Are you lazy to tag people?
not really but yes. wtheck haha.

20th : Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone?
my sunflower. =p don't know who a? my sayang. still don't know? Momoko says, MY BOY! =p

21st : What's 2 + 2?
5. eh? not 5? 7. eh eh no not 7! ah i don't know.

22nd : Who's your idol?
powerpuff save the world! fighting crime, trying to save the world, bla bla bla just in time, THE POWERPUFF GIRL! POWERPUFF da da da da da! @.@

23rd : Are you a monster?
hohoho. evil monster!

24th : Do you play with Barbie dolls?
yea when i was a kid. and i used to cut the barbie's hair and expect it to grow back. so i waited for years and years, and the barbie still with short ugly hair. i know i used to be so stupid when i was a kid. kid what!

25th : What was the last movie you watched?
Madagascar Escape to Africa! move it move it~ but i watched half way through only. =(

26th : What do you think about your English?
so so la. can pass the exam, can communicate with bangladesh, can understand lyrics, can translate when stucked in BM. haha.

27th : What do you think about your Bahasa Malaysia?
i once thought that my BM is not-that-bad. and i talked some these days with Momoko and friends, and i was so proud of it. until lately only i found out that actually my BM sucks to the max. i can't help changed to English when talking to the taxi driver, can't understand how much the cashier wants me to pay, and the most ridiculous is............. I ACTUALLY CREATED MY NEW WORDS! like MENGALAMI KESEJUKAN????? tell me i'm right please. everyone is making fun of these two bloody stupid words which i randomly blurted out. sigh.

28th : Who do you hate?
the sacarstic one, smile wickedly at me when i can't answer questions in class, sacarsticly wants me to teach him when he knows my level is much lower than him, and thought he is so good but actually he's not. YOU SUPER KIASU I HATE YOU!

29th : Do you love yourself?
hahaha. other than the boyfriend, the only one i lurve is me myself =)

30th : Blurt out 5 random words
wtheck
har? (pissed yongsheng off today har har.)
why like that?
very immoral eh..
yer disgusting la!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

是真的不明白,还是不想明白?

一个人真的很难撑。为什么你永远都不明白?...

Saturday, November 22, 2008

me nice quote

"being good and caring might be a fault as well..just good but not too good and it depends on who r the one u treating..love is not to hurt.."
- Jing Shuang

Love is such a big knowledge and i suck in it. sigh. think on the bright side, nevermind i have whole life to learn it. =)

As for me, lurve is like a boomerang. if it's yours, it will come back to you, providing it is thrown the right way.

p/s: eh i think for so long already only get this theory. quote me quote me! =D

i believe that if it's mine it will come back to me. if it's not then i shouldn't hold it tight.

Friday, November 21, 2008

tagged by Tzen


1. take a recent picture of yourself or take a picture right now..

2. don't change ur clothes, just take a picture..

3. post that picture with NO editing..

4. post the picture with these instruction..

5. tag 7 people to this..

6. *no tag backs*

i tag no one. tak da mood.
i am an attention seeker. so desperate. but why the one whom's attention i wanted so much do not give any respond yet making things worse?

aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh so cranky can die!!!! i want to go home. sob4.

bloody accounting project =(

i go all cranky the whole day.

test was rescheduled earlier, and i was late and skipped two classes and things just went not right. should say start from yesterday evening. some things are bugging me so hard that i think i shall start to think every single thing all over again and make the best decision. very annoying, and the person i wanted so much was not with me. =(

currently still in the library, doing accounting final project which should have handed in today. luckily Mr KC postponed the deadline. me and Mandy have so limited knowledge on accounting and we are struggling like hell now. in add, there's no one for us to yell for help! like everyone really done everything and we are the worst one sangat loner in library. i guess today we can't finish it and i have to come to college again on weekends to finish this project. my accounting is near fail already. and i cannot fail this subject. ahhhhhh god popi popi. =(

moody can make everything goes worse kan? but can't help not moody. why i like that ah?? i feel like killing myself. so depressed. yesterday night crammed Statistic until 5 in the morning. wthell. seriously lack of resting already.

ANYONE PRO IN ACCOUNTING, WILLING TO LEND A HELPING HAND ON PROJECT ANALYSIS???????? LEAVE A MESSAGE IN MY CBOX PLEASE! VERY DESPERATE NEED A PERSON WHO KNOWS HOW TO SOLVE CASH FLOW PROBLEMS!!!!!!!!! seriously where got people so good eat full nothing to do come and help me. sigh. better continue to depress.

byebye people come 11th floor library to save me out! =(

signing off,
a pig with right sore eye.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

limits.

i believe that people treat others they way they want to be treated. i always yearned to be treated like how i treat others. but why reality can't stop pushing me down from my beliefs?

i trusted people easily. and it's too easy till people treated it worthless already. and i can't blame others when i hurted so much and it's their fault cause the next second i will be drowning in guilty. i hate myself of being like that, i can't just take and go or leave and go the things i've hold for times.

every happenings will affect my mood for the whole day, or sometimes for days. someone asked "why have to think so much?". it's beyond my control. maybe i treat everything so importantly, and i mind every changes in life. i am not stupid. i just treat things seriously.

i have limits too. and since small i have trained by the surroundings to make my limits as big as possible. please, i hope people out there dealing with me, please have your limits too. i don't know how much more i can take in, and i will make everything over without concerning the importance of it.

some things are so important in my life, but if is over limit, i will try to adapt my new life without it. i say it, and i will mean it. i am an ordinarian, not God, with feelings too so don't take granted on me.

the bestie says, sometimes treat other people good is hurting ownself. yes i agreed but stupid guilty keep striking on me for no reason. and i always ended up blaming myself. sigh!

for certain things, it's going to touch my limits already. and i keep extending my limits to not hurt people around me. i just want everything to be easy. but when people are making it even complicated, i can be a real bitch too.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

for those who hated me so much,

my right eye is having some infection AGAIN. and this time it's so serious that whole of my eyelid sores. red and bengkak. wtheck tomorrow i have calculus test eh... havent finish revising and now i hardly can open my right eyes. and i'm tearing non-stop now.. sigh! =(

now you can laugh all you want.

the one making me suffer like shit in this semester

being in Sunda's class is a disaster. being in Sunda's classes every weekdays is hellish torture. 10 days countingdown to final exam and he is going to make us do a project for each subjects. test will be holding on thursday and friday somemore. and a lot of assignments he sent thru emails and want us to do it before class.

did i mention that he didn't really teach everything in class before asking us to attempt the assignment? and want us to read up ourselves and ask questions during the next class? and we will be so blur case while doing the assignment and most of us leave it blank and piss him off? wtheck seriously being in his class is a big no no for those who have registered for next semester. seriously can die. T_______T

i'm still doing Statistics assignment now. T________________T

click and see how many mails Sunda can send in 24 hours. freaking 4 mails wtheck!

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

I like to move it move it~

before i start my post, i have to make thing clear that the last saturday's post is not talking about my boyfriend. ah i hate misunderstanding.

i like to move it move it! he likes to move it move it! she likes to move it move! we like to... MOVE IT! hahahahaha i went to watch Madagascar with leen yesterday. but half way thru we have to leave for some reason. =( but we have good laughs for an hour! it's so funny.. hahahaha... i will watch it completely again. =D

Tzen, i'm so sorry to tell you that the present i expected you will like it very much, is not for sale. LOL! i got so shocked when i asked the promoter and she said "itu bukan untuk dijual la..." =.= like if you are not selling it then don't la display it out.. big sigh! pop my bubbles of seeing Tzen's anticipation. =(

i don't know why but my mood is floating these days. i can laugh so hard for a moment, and the next second i will be damn quiet. my life is out of my control already. and i thought of visiting psychologist. then only i realised that most people around me are related to psychology. my dad is a psychology degree holder, my sis is currently persuing psychology in Australia, Momoko, Jason, and Charles are doing psychology in ADP. LOL i can have mental treatment for freeeeeeee, and they need to queue to make appointment to treat me. haha. i think i'm out of control again. sigh.

my academic is worsening. i actually flunked my Microeconomics mid-term exam when i was so confidently thought that i can get an A for it. sounds so stupid kan? 2 bloody questions made me dropped to hell from heaven. =( another case, blamed the KTM, i was late for Accounting last important test. i couldn't manage to finish the accounts and my final answers are ALL different from my classmates. pathetic. i hope i can gain some marks in the process part. sigh more! my CGPA will be plunging kao kao this semester. no more an honour student for sure. saddening kan? =(

i don't really like year end. i mean i don't really like the 3rd quarter of the year. don't ask me why but these months are usually the break-up months or problems months or stressful months. aiya the unlucky months la.. if break up with a good reason nevermind la.. but what i heard the most are those very unresasonable reasons. or should say it's excuses and not reasons. feelings are made by man, man decides feelings and not feelings control man. i don't know why people like to blame on feelings when they feel like breaking up. i can't accept this. (yer later i'm the one who use it lol).. most girls are complicated.. i'm not. i'm the easy-going one.. =p sometimes i don't really understand what they want also.. when the boyfriend treated them badly, they cannot accept. when the boyfriend treated them good, they cannot accept also. like that what you want la? *faint* i don't know why am i writing all those but they just suddenly come to my mind. not accusing anyone here.

my blog is too wordy these days. no photos. my pendrive just went missing few days ago and all photos and what not all gone. see all unlucky things always come to me one... =( lazy nak upload community service photos also. =p

Happy Birthday Ena! xoxo.

p/s: omg this post is oh-so-random. my whole brain is thinking what to eat for lunch. Ebi Tempura Don or BK's mushroom swiss? sigh financial crisis.

Monday, November 17, 2008

whose's birthday?

Happy Belated Birthday, Zoe Reeves!!!!
(at least i wish. late is always better than never. =p)

legal already har... must play safe know.. ;)
my twin brother is a playboy. advise you to find another better guy. haha.

the girl's birthday on the 14th we didn't even prepare present. cause i remember the wrong date. lol. sorry la tzen... i didn't know which bugger tell me the wrong date eh.. not my fault ha... =p
present is on the way. you will like it for sure. =)

xoxo.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

am updating posts. (yes there are a few drafts to be completed.) i don't want my words hurt anyone so yea, will keep editing until I'm satisfied only i post em up. so bare with me.

my life was a mess last week. i experienced the most hurtful thing, and my mind just went so incomplete for a short period. i realized that sincerity is bullshit, trustworthy is just nothing these days. people just think for their own, and I'm just a nobody. for once, i thought i am going to die. not cause of the incident, but the principle i believe so far has been destroyed. there's no hatred, cause i found that i can't even hate. i do what i think is right, so do others. and how others going to treat me is totally beyond me. all i need to do is take what they think i should take and treat them all of my heart. reality is harsh. so damn harsh and yea, i lost to fate. there's so much for me to learn and so many truth I've finally knew in just one short week. should say God wanted to test how tough a person i am? and i won.

i have a whole bunch of good memories in that place setting, but someone just destroyed it so damn easily. trust is not to play. so don't play with trust. cause once you destroy the trust I've built for you, too bad there's no next chance. anyhow, thanks for the memories, thanks for the way you treated me. i hope it's not faking all this while. at least i trusted for the last time, i know it's not. don't take grant on my trust, for it is priceless.

someone says i acted pity. oh well, I'm just not in the mood to fake around, even just a smile. too bad, I'm not angelic after all. haha.

i will remember the good things. the bad ones will fade in no time. i am still me, but a lil more grown up. my mind was so overloaded with complicated theories the whole week and now i just want a good rest. this is my blog, i rant, but i'm not accusing anyone. it's my blog after all, i write for myself. so read and forget. more posts coming up. ;) good night peeps.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

".....a person who gives you happiness hurts you the most."

everytime i need you the most, you will not be with me.
and i have to pick my shattered feelings up myself and pretend like nothing happens before.
i just want you, not others, if you ever understand how that feels.
i hate myself faking my life and be like a princess when i'm not.
i hate when i voice up everything but get no response, hurt still hurts, bleed still bleeding.
few more disappointments, and my heart no longer live.

i fall. so hard. so pain. so cold. so weak. yet who cares?

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

too full. bursted. how i wish i could take in more.
over limits. accidentally slided off. how i wish i could hold it tight.

how much more could i bare? how long more could i wait?
who cares? cause nobody gives a shit.

the harder i breathe, the cramper my heart is.
the more i wish, the harder i fall.

bullshit once says, thank everything which go against you. cause they will made you a stronger person. bullshit, i take that.

Monday, November 3, 2008

memoire

the ups, the downs, the upsidedowns,
what we tear, we share, and those we have bared,
so many things i have yearned, and i learned, that there's no perfection to be earned.
i wish the time we spend together duplicates, happiness remains and sadness fades.
i wish you are vitalised by my presence, the bonds between us is never lose to time and distance.
if cupid ever exist, i hope to get strike with you twice.
if eternality survives, by every chance i would seize it right!

it's hard, but we made through a year! i believe there will be more years coming by.. =)

Happy 1st anniversary, baby! thanks for the memories in the past year. i've gone through a lot, learned a lot, grown up a lot. 9 12 21 18 22 5 25 15 18 =)

too bad i can't even meet the dearest during our 1st anniversary. =( blame SAM boo!

Sunday, November 2, 2008

crap. rubbish. crap. rubbish. wtheck.

ahhhhhhhh for the 1st time i don't know how to start a post. and i found it's hard to give a title to my post. cause my posts are all merely the same. so plain boring, i just can't think of anything interesting to boost my readership. how ah how ah???... those going to have final exam's geek-wannabe also can write better post than me. why i like that ah???

it's one hour before me and boyfriend's 1st anniversary. celebration has been postponed after his final exam. so suei his final exam starts right tommorow. sigh. nevermind since i haven't think of how to celebrate also. =p lagipun now in financial crisis so yea at least there's some time for me to be prepared lol. proposed to dad bout my part time job cause i really need money $.$ he said he will pay me like his employees if i really finish my job in time, nicely. but then he wants me to work for mom instead of him, and it's kinda fed up to work for mom since i worked for her when i was still a kid and it really annoyed me. like this cannot like that cannot, have to OT until late midnight, sometimes last minute work have to rush until dawn, and they always con me say want to pay me but at last used up my money in starbucks or new zealand natural.. damn saddening. daddy doesn't allow me to work away from home, sigh no choice i really love money so much now so i will be working for them for the coming weeks.

random: window XP damn hard to use. i want window vista back. =(

this week will be the busiest week ever. tomorrow grandma is going to admit into putrajaya's hospital. this coming wednesday she will be having a leg operation. putrajaya damn far eh.. somemore now klang's jam is even worse due to the construction's road block. Eda is going to sit for her grade7 piano practical exam on tuesday and i have to drill her until she really get prepared. wednesday i am going to a STAT field trip in the morning. have to do stats presentation after that. sien. PHIL's 10 hours community service still undone, most probably going to Cheras's orphanage this saturday. good to say that boyfriend is having exam and i am so busy, so that i won't keep kacau him. =p

see, end up with bunch of rubbish again.

p/s:
SAMmies, all the best! =) do the best already, apply for University of Queensland, then we go UQ bersama-sama! =)

Saturday, November 1, 2008

nothing. nothing. really nothing.

daddy wants to buy me a laptop since jie left for Aussie. how many months already, jie's coming back in two weeks time, and my laptop still tak nampak lagi. (wtheck i am so obsessed to bm nowadays i can't help adding some bm in my sentences and momoko the mangsa now speak some bm like me already. =______=) i'm not those technology savvy person and i just need a laptop which i can bring along to everywhere, with just basic office software and wireless connection. that's all. daddy always con me one... =(

in the meantime, i am sharing PC with daddy. i am not fancy bout PC. don't ask me why i just like laptop. maybe i was brought up with laptop. since small i didn't really use PC other than in school. i was so obsessed to laptop's keyboard. the sound of typing is cooler also. =____=

wait, actually after lotsa nonsense, the main thing i want to write is THE PC WHICH I WAS USING THESE DAYS DIE-ED!!!!! not die, not died, not dead, IT'S DIE-ED!!! (pronounce as: dai-ded) extreme way of die lol. something happened like software or hardware corrupted and it just can't function and the screen is wholly blue with white words. i called my uncle who used to fix our house's computer's problem but he's on his way to the airport to KK. suei! then my dad's friend came while i was alone at home just now. freaking scary cause that uncle is a stranger to me. and he told me, the blue screen is the most scariest problem cause not all files can be backed up if it's hardware corrupted. i was like wtheck cause if the pc died means i am going to use another pc means i can't use window vista anymore. saddening! but the clever me backed up all my files last week so i still have everything with me. unlike my dad, awwwww so sad, all his business files were in the computer and he always malas nak back up. i mourn for his files. =p

i don't know why i always wanted to blog something meaningful but ended up writing rubbish here. my readership plunged more than 50 percent already. so sad my earning stucked at the same figure for almost 2 weeks already. lifeless la in financial crisis now. so regret i went to starbucks twice after i was once so determined to quit starbucks. sighhhhh!

Friday, October 31, 2008

LOW JOCIN IS A CHICKEN BACKSIDE!

okay la actually i'm the chicken backside. lol. i was at her house just now, we talked from 4 to 9..... 5 hours non-stop, sambil cakap sambil cakap, sambil cakap sambil makan, sambil cakap sambil travelling in car, sambil cakap sambil.............. seriously non-stop and i am going to lost my voice now! (no la kidding la! i'm used to talk a lot. she's the one who is going to lost her voice =p) SHE OFFICIALLY BREAK THE RECORD OF KHAIWEE SWEETIE WHO HAVEN'T TALK TO ME FOR 5 HOURS ONE SHOT! at least we rested and continued. i really so admire myself of being so talkative. LOL! lagipun that girl is going to have her very-important SAM final exam next monday. but she should thank me cause i destressed her. i rescued her from studying 24-7. and she taught me a lot of things. thanks sweetie! =)

random: tiny Jocin lives in a huge house. =p

and i am so cranky now. emo shit for few reasons. why like that??????? =( i hate myself when i am having bloody red-tide. i ffk-ed my ex-classmates. i skipped the 1st graduation anniversary gathering. a bit regret. =*(